How to (Not) Clean Your Bathroom

I used to clean my bathroom.

Then I had a baby.  And no matter what I did I just couldn’t seem to make it that far.  It was especially frustrating since I could distinctly remember, in the not so distant past, dusting every Wednesday, cleaning the bathroom on Thursday, and mopping the floors each Friday.  Unfortunately the memory was becoming increasingly vague.  I did what?  Are you sure?
134407Finally I gave up trying to go back to the old ways.  It just wasn’t going to happen.  Time to call in the reserves.


Personally, I always looked down on disposable cleaning products.  Cleaning for men and babies, that’s what.  Pshaw.  Hey wait, don’t I have a few of those around here somewhere….  New plan, I clean the bathroom once a month (because face it, that was what I was clocking at already) and you clean it the rest of the time.  Here, have a Clorox wipe.  (And I’m sure homemade wipes with my own vinegar solution would be more ideal.  However, this was more of a drive by sort of situation.  Also, it appears I’m still driving.)

134412The result?  I couldn’t be happier.  The bathroom actually looks better with them touching it up every day, than it did when I  thoroughly cleaned it once a week.  Because they would just come in 15 minutes later and smear their spaghetti hands all over everything  anyways.

So here’s the drill.  First off, when I clean the bathroom I make sure the Clorox toilet tab is going strong, or put in a new one.  I’ve tried all kinds and that’s the only one that convinces me it does any good.  Then, every day after that, the children are allowed to expend one disinfecting wipe; alternating between the sink, tub surround, and toilet.  I keep the inside of the tub clean (enough) by rinsing it with a designated pitcher after every use.  Downstairs, I threw a bottle of shower spray in the shower and said, “Use it, because you don’t know when, or if, I will ever clean your shower again.”  I also went so far as to buy one of those toilet wands with the disposable heads.  When I notice a toilet bowl starting to go the way of all the earth, I give the appointed child “toilet wand dispensation.”  Their soul thrills.  Originally, I thought I would just clean the whole bathroom at that point.  But I looked around and everything was still clean.  So the heck with that.  Now the only time I clean the bathroom is when we’ve had the plague.  Or house guests.

Another thing that helps is that I rub the sink down every night.  I noticed that when I wash my face I get water on pretty much everything anyways.  So when I’m done, I dry my face and use the same towel to dry the sink and buff the faucet.  It gets all the little imperfections the kids left.  Good as new.  And last but not least, don’t pee standing up in my house.  Your masculinity is not proved by the amount of urine you leave on my floor.  As my husband astutely noted, urinals and the back-yard are designed for erratic and upright peeing.  Toilets are not.  Of course, it also helps to have designated “his” and “hers” bathrooms, in case of any contingencies.  The only true solution being not to let them in to begin with.  That’s right.


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